A grateful heart is a happy heart.
This is a statement I intimately understand and have come to trust, through my own journey in pursuit of inner peace and happiness. In my life I have experienced a myriad of emotions during times of profound stress, suffering, chaos, and loss — as well as times of immense joy, bliss — and everything in between. Through it all, I have learned that gratitude is the virtue with the greatest power to change perception of life experiences and elevate our state of being.
Focusing on the past or future often robs us of the present moment, but gratitude is the key to finding happiness and peace in the present moment. As I shared in a previous article on gratitude, it is important to understand the transformational power of this beautiful energy, which is considered to be the ‘mother of all virtues.’
Of all positive energies, gratitude is the easiest to cultivate, yet many people struggle to recognize its presence in their lives. When working with clients, I often hear them say, "What do I have to be grateful for? My life is a mess." Their focus is so consumed by what they perceive is lacking in their lives that they overlook their blessings.
After validating the emotional attachment, I ask a few simple but pointed questions. A few include: “Are you in constant, unbearable pain? If not, you are fortunate, as many endure continuous intense pain. Can you see the colours of a sunset or the delicate bloom of flowers? Can you hear the laughter of children, the melodies of birds, or your favourite song? Do you have food to eat, a roof over your head and a bed to sleep in? Are you safe from political or religious persecution? Do you have mobility? Is there someone that loves you? Do you have a friend? My dear friend David taught me the power of gratitude after he had a terrible accident that robbed his mobility.
There are countless blessings in our lives that we take for granted. If we take even a few moments each day to acknowledge them, we greatly increase our capacity for happiness. Things to be grateful for can be as simple as a kind gesture from a friend or as significant as good health. The capacity to love and know we are loved, as well as our state of health are a couple of the greatest areas for which to have gratitude.
Even though there are many ways to integrate gratitude into daily life, one of the most effective and transformative methods is keeping a gratitude journal. Journaling rewires the brain for positivity and reduces stress. I encourage my clients to dedicate a journal solely for this purpose, writing in it every night before bed — listing five to 10 things they are grateful for. In the morning, before climbing out of bed, I suggest reading the entries (and even adding to them). This simple practice fosters a sense of calm and optimism, preparing the mind to embrace the day ahead with a positive attitude. I have maintained this habit for years, and its impact is truly life-changing.
However, I have also observed that many people abandon their gratitude practice despite its profound benefits. When working with David, I discovered a couple key reasons: attachment to suffering and guilt. When we are so heavily influenced by our own negativity, it is hard to imagine ourselves without it. Victimization can be quite addictive and prevents us from being accountable for our own state of mind and subsequent actions. Some people may not know who they are without their story of suffering.
If one cannot maintain a practice of gratitude, sometimes guilt and worthiness can play a factor. How can one feel comfortable experiencing happiness when they know others are suffering? One only needs to turn on the news to witness accounts of terrible suffering and loss in the world. After reflecting deeply on this dilemma, I sought insight through prayer and meditation. The answer became clear to me.
Gratitude, as a powerful incoming energy, must be balanced with an intention of sending outgoing loving energy. I started breathing in gratitude and breathing out the energy of love — sometimes focusing it on a person, a family, a situation, a community, our planet, or just out to the ether — trusting that my loving blessing would land where it needs to. This dual process in my practice was transformative.
Some important tips regarding gratitude: make it a consistent practice as, with any practice, it gets easier over time. Give it time to work, as it may seem like just words at first, but the embodied feeling of gratitude will come with practice and resonate emotionally rather than just intellectually. Be specific and detailed in your grateful declarations.
In addition to journalling, there are many other ways to express gratitude: a ritual of thanks before meals; reframing a difficult situation by looking for the lesson in optimism through adversity; creating a jar full of notes of gratitude (and reading them periodically); going on a gratitude walk in nature with mindfulness and awareness of the wonder of the natural world; thanking others whenever you get a chance; volunteering because it helps foster empathy and leads to gratitude for our own situation; and having gratitude for our own qualities, efforts and achievements. It helps build our own self-esteem and self-image.
Gratitude is not merely a fleeting emotion — it is a practice that enhances overall well-being. Studies have shown that cultivating gratitude leads to a more positive outlook on life, improved resilience in the face of challenges, enhanced physical and mental health, reduced stress, anxiety, and depression, better quality of sleep, and stronger more meaningful relationships.
Gratitude moves us into the present moment, which is the only state of mind in which we can feel fulfilled. When we find ourselves slipping into negativity, we can consciously redirect our focus by counting our blessings, one by one. This simple shift alters brain chemistry, fostering a state of positivity and resilience as feelings of negativity (such as fear, anger, resentment, guilt, or victimhood) — cannot coexist with a mindset of gratitude.
Gratitude becomes more than just a practice — it becomes a way of living. By integrating it into our daily routines, we cultivate a mindset that transforms our reality, bringing us closer to a life of joy, presence, inner peace and happiness.
Claire Nielsen is a health coach, author, public speaker and founder of www.elixirforlife.ca. The information provided in the above article is for educational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional health and medical advice. Please consult a doctor, health-care provider or mental health practitioner if you're seeking medical advice, diagnoses and/or treatment.
